A Lesson on Forgiveness

If you remember I was asking for Prayers last week for an event that happened last night.  

I'm happy to say that nothing happened last night.  When I say nothing, I mean that basically ---- we were in the same room together (which hasn't happened in four years).  She didn't acknowledge me, speak to me, or look at me.  But, it's in a step of progress that I was invited and that she stayed in the room while I was there.  At one point we had a "group" conversation filled with memories and I gave some brief input, which she did, after pausing, acknowledge.  There was also another point when I had to ask her specifically when they were leaving, and she answered that quite frustrated-ingly but, she answered it.  

It's a God thing.  I realize it.  He's handling it in his timing, not mine.  I also realized last night, there is a lesson to be learned here.  Actually, there is quite a few.  **Warning** Random thoughts and topics ahead.

1.  God's timing - Is when He knows we are ready, regardless if we think we are.  

Last night was something I've been waiting for and thought I was prepared for 3.5 years.  I realize now that it's taken me that long to learn where I get my strength from, when I should call out for him, and ask others to help.  The event placed several of my friends in the same place to support me.  I also know that his timing is different for everyone. 

Remember I said I was an "otter"?   That's a personality thing, I'm outgoing by nature and prefer to have good times and make sure that everyone else is too.  I also do things at full speed and forget that others don't.  God is doing baby steps for all of the people involved.  My heart is telling me this is because at some points, I need to slow down and for others.... that's how they are prepared to handle it.  

2.  East to West -  That's how far the sin is cast. (Psalm 103:12)  

Because we are human, I think we forget that.  I saw first hand last night how God demonstrates his healing and forgiveness.  My husband was able to go up to a person who had hurt him deeply, hug them, and tell them he loved them.  Here I was, dealing in my own puddle of hurt because of someone who wouldn't acknowledge me - yet Hubby was overcoming the same thing and casting out all of his hurts.  How different we learn!! 

Guess what that taught me!??!  It's not my place to stay in the puddle.  I have to cast out my hurt, I have to wait on her timing(which is ultimately God's), and  I need to love her as Christ loves me.  I know that I've asked forgiveness, that ball is in her court.  It's just time for me to stop acting like the grounded child being angry at waiting.

3.  My God is Good!  ALL the TIME!!

Over all, I had a pleasant night.  We were celebrating a marriage that has lasted for 40 years and has MANY more to come!  Great lessons, pictures, and memories were shared last night to a room full of family and friends.  The people we were honoring were truly blessed by the friends and family that were present.  God was sprinkling moments and memories for us all to learn from - and a good bit of us noticed.

Thank you, Father, for being real to me.  Thank you for always being there.  Thank you for giving me strength and courage as you voiced it.  I continue to ask for healing, in your time.